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November 16, 2008

Break time...

"Don't let your mind bully your body into believing it must carry the burden of its worries."- Astrid Alauda


I know things are sucking for a lot of people lately. Stress is running rampant. Things are ugly and you feel beyond tired. I understand, and I really feel for you. So that's why I'm giving you permission to take a break.

No, seriously. Just put everything down and walk a way for a bit. Take any kind of break you need; be it mental, emotional, social, or physical. Sadly, the cause of your stress isn't going to magically go away. (I'm not that talented.) But, despite your fears it isn't going to get worse either unless you ignore it for an extended period of time.

What are you waiting on? Oh, maybe you don't know how to de-stress. I don't know what exactly will work for you, but I'll share some of my stress busters.

Music is probably my most used one. I'll put on a specific playlist and sing till my throat hurts. I focus solely on the music and lyrics. Everything else slides away and I relax.

Watching a movie or reading a book is also a good way to relax. I do think that it should be something you haven't seen or read before. Because, if you have the stress will creep back in during a boring part.

Sex is often another recommended way to deal with stress. Let's face it sometimes that just isn't feasible. I also don't think it's a good idea to find a fuck buddy when you are stressed. I mean come on, everyone knows that is for extreme cases of boredom or drunkenness*. But, hell if you have access, ya might as well take advantage of it.

Finally, my second best way to deal with stress is to meditate and go to your happy place. Everyone should have a happy place, and they should make it super fucking slamming.


Until next time, "Oh but it's okay to breathe your worries away when everything and everyone tries to lead you astray. Hold your own, hold your ground, hold to light when you're down and always believe that there's a way back home."**

autumn



*- Please note, Autumn does not condone casual sex in the cases of boredom or drunkenness. After all her father reads this blog.

**- The until next time is lyrics from Hold by Axium.

November 15, 2008

Really?

"Music is the mediator between the spiritual and the sensual life."- Ludwig van Beethoven


So I can align chakras. I can manipulate energy. I can call elements... I can not for the life of me tune this damned guitar. I know, I know... The strings are new and apparently new strings stretch rapidly. (It so would have been nice to know that before.) I've only had it for a few hours and it takes time to learn these things.

Have I ever mentioned that I'm a desperately impatient person?

I thought that after these few hours I would be bitching that my fingers hurt and that the F chord could eat my ass. (That's just an example. I'm not sure yet if the F chord will become my nemesis. Although I am sure at least one will.)

Have I ever mentioned that I really love bitching?

Heh, don't worry though. I am about to go teach this guitar that I'm the boss around here and that it will do what I say.

Until next time, no it's still to sharp damnit.
autumn

November 14, 2008

Days like today... may just be perfect.

"While we try to teach our children all about life, Our children teach us what life is all about."- Angela Schwindt


I spent the day with Little Bit. For those of you who aren't mind readers, Little Bit is my niece. Little Bit is two years old. She is growing up so fast and it's amazing to watch. We spent the day playing with Barbies, dancing to the Wiggles, and well I'm not sure what the other games were that she invented. But, it was a blast.

I love watching her learn new things. She is fascinated with music and drawing. She is determined to figure everything out and learn to do it herself. I have to say my brother has done a great job so far. She has even learned that I well placed pout and an "I sowwy" can get you out of any trouble you encounter. Such as pulling out every wash cloth in the closet and taking them to your room. Granted she had an undeniable reason for doing so. "Barbie Blanket".

She has me there. Barbies do indeed need blankets. They would be cold otherwise.

Until next time, or however long it takes me to knit Barbie blankets.
autumn

November 13, 2008

I am me.

“I took a deep breath and listened to the old bray of my heart. I am. I am. I am.- Sylvia Plath


I thought it might be nice to get to know each other. I want to hear about things you've learned, who you are, and even what you aren't. Since I imagine you are shy, I will start.


I've learned that a glass of tea plus a keyboard equals death and destruction.

I try to see beauty in everything. At least, that's what I use to tell my parents when they asked why I hadn't finished cleaning my room.

When I was little I wanted to be a fashion designer. Yes, Ms. What-do-you-mean-my-closet-is-lacking-color-Gray-and-Black-are-totally-colors wanted to design things for other people to wear.

I have more hobbies ::coughobsessionscough:: than Bella has shoes.

I enjoy all things spooky and scary except bats...

I've learned that one of my best friends wants me to get a pet bat. Which obviously means that he wants me to get rabies and die.

Nothing is funnier than seeing an owl divebomb the aforementioned best friend's head, and hearing him scream like a little bitch.

I have learned that slamming off the water faucet is not a great defense against an unknown skeery thing. (That was just for you Ethan.)

Obviously, my friends and I spend way to much time trying to freak the other out.

I am convinced that my dentist is a government paid torturer by night. In my mind that is the only reason for the insane amounts of pain that he causes me.

I dislike birthdays immensely and think that if they have to be acknowledged at all they should be refered to as Escape from the Womb Day.

The phrase “the best thing ever.” is the best thing ever with “blank rocks my face off” as a close second.

I am addicted to myspace surveys.

Finally, I never get to bed at a reasonable time. As I am typing this, I realize that I should have been asleep hours ago.


So, that's part of me. We may make this a running blog and pick it up from time to time. That's something to think about at any rate.

Until next time, here I come sleep.
autumn

November 12, 2008

grrrr

This is your blog. My keyboard died and I am blogging by phone. Fucking keyboard. I mean really… emailing myself from the phone and then copy and pasting sucks major ass. grrrr. Oh and this means I am stuck on windows till I replace this bullshit. emailing log-in info and passwords suck more. Fuck.

autumn

November 11, 2008

We don't say it enough...

"We often take for granted the very things that most deserve our gratitude."- Cynthia Ozick


This is a note to say thank you. Thank you for helping those who can not help themselves. Thank you for defending what we all hold dear. Thanks you for sacrificing in ways that we can not imagine. Thank you for your patience with those who just don't get it.


"Unselfish and noble actions are the most radiant pages in the biography of souls."- David Thomas



Until next time, Happy Veterans Day.
autumn

November 10, 2008

I don't think it's cheating...

"In everyone's life, at some time, our inner fire goes out. It is then burst into flame by an encounter with another human being. We should all be thankful for those people who rekindle the inner spirit."- Albert Schweitzer


So, is it cheating to write a blog about not having a blog to write? Because, guess what? That is totally what you are reading. I mean, it's words... In my mind that totally counts.


Actually, I had a migraine and was avoiding the evil white glare of my word processor. After many Excedrin, dark corners, and begging anyone who looked at me to cut off my head it slowly started fading away. Granted by that time, Shameless had come over to hang out. Which was followed by me going to see Ethan. Let's face it, since Ethan rarely comes into town I wasn't going to blow him off to write.


You get this. Which hey, at least I posted. Right?


Actually if you need something new and exciting... I did a booty dance over a peanut butter and jelly sandwich tonight. I haven't done that since I was in middle school. To be fair the middle school me wasn't really dancing over pb & j. It was more of a yay-I-didn't-get-grocery-store-chicken-salad-which-is-really-more-vomit-in-a-cup-salad dance.


I've decided tonight's impromptu dance means that I'm enjoying the simple things in life more. Or, that I was really hungry. Ya know, whichever.


Until next time, dance away.
autumn

November 9, 2008

Feeling my way...

"A half-baked idea is okay as long as it's in the oven."- Unknown


That is my new mantra. I have to stop worrying about where my writing is going. After all as long as it's going, it will have to end up somewhere. If I don't like it then I will just have to revise it.


I also need to remind myself that quote applies to this blog as well. As of right now, I'm not sure where I will end up. I know what I want to accomplish but not how to get there. That is ok, I was the exact same way with my other blog.


After all what better way to find my feet than forcing myself to post on here daily. So yup thanks NaBloPoMo.


Until next time, maybe I'll have something to write about.
autumn

November 8, 2008

I'm asking you to help me...

"It is dangerous to be right in matters on which the established authorities are wrong."- Voltaire


This weekend there are several more protests regarding Prop 8, that unfortunately seems like it will be passed. There as been a small amount of violence in one protest. (You can read about prop 8 and the protests on beshameless.net)I am proposing that we all raise energy to keep the protesters safe.

While these remaining ones are happening please light a candle, focus, think happy thoughts, or do whatever it is you do. The protesters deserve our love and support if we can give them nothing else.


Until next time, my candles are lit.
autumn

November 7, 2008

Catching up...

"Ink and paper are sometimes passionate lovers, oftentimes brother and sister, and occasionally mortal enemies."- Emme Woodhull-B├Ąche


Damn you, NaNoWriMo. Damn you, Main Characters. Damn you, plot. Damn you, internal editor. Damn you, non-typing fingers. Damn you, stupid word count... ::breathes::


So how's your writing going? Nano and I are in the love/hate portion of our relationship. Ok, ok Nano and I are in the "I fucking hate you" portion. I'm willing to try and work it out though. I intend on doing a writing push for most of the night tonight to try and catch up on my word count. If you hear about a crazy lady down the street bashing her computer with a baseball bat, don't worry that is just me.


Until next time, ::inaudible grumbles about stupid ideas::
autumn

November 6, 2008

It's in the stars...

"Astrology is a language. If you understand this language, the sky speaks to you."- Dane Rudhyar


So class was tonight, and it went well. After we finished with gossip we started on the basics of astrology. I imagine this is a subject that will take us a few weeks to get through. By the end I hope to cap off with her creating and interpreting her own birth chart.

I'm not exactly sure about something though and wanted your take on it. Do you think someone should first be taught how to chart by hand followed by time saving software or vice versa? I can see the pros and cons for each side, and I'm torn by which way to take.

Leave me a comment and tell me how you learned, how you teach, or any other comments you have.

Until next time, Bright Blessings.
autumn

November 5, 2008

How do I forget these things?

"Nothing is so fatiguing as the eternal hanging on of an uncompleted task."- William James


I completely forgot to post today. It was incredibly busy, and sadly this post didn't even cross my mind. I am thrilled that Obama won, and have gone into detail about it on Beshameless. If you a curious please check it out.



Also today, I remembered that I am teaching a class tomorrow afternoon. Do I really need to say that I forgot to prepare for it too? Tonight is a mad scramble made of word counts, deep thoughts, and furious typing, and the properties of Scorpio. Ok so maybe more than Scorpio. I'm going over Astrology and Zodiac signs in general.


I think that I need a personal assistant. Or maybe just a new brain. Anyone want to volunteer for either?


Until next time, please excuse the short posts. I'll do better, I promise.
autumn

November 4, 2008

I'm addicted to news channels...

"Adopt the pace of nature: her secret is patience."- Ralph Waldo Emerson

So I hope you voted today; I definitely did. The lines weren't as bad as expected and it went very smoothly. Now the only thing to do is wait and watch.

It's the waiting that gets me. I never was a patient person. But at least I'm watching the states slowly starting to turn colors. Unfortunately, mine as already turned red. I didn't really expect anything else though.

I'm going back to gluing myself to news sites. I'll be back when it is said and done.

Until next time, turn blue damn you.
autumn

November 3, 2008

It's our turn for action...

"The politicians were talking themselves red, white and blue in the face."- Clare Boothe Luce


I promise, the election talk is almost over. The attack ads will stop tomorrow. Soon there after we will fade back to normal. You won't have to worry about your football game being interrupted with hearing the candidates talk. (Sure it's half time when they'll be talking but maybe I don't want my "Weeee, Redskins" vibe ruined.)


In the meantime, I have posted and article on BeShameless.net with information on who to contact if you experience problems. Please check it out. I hope you won't need the information, but you never know.


Despite the outcome of the election tomorrow, we will begin the path to change. I just really hope that it will be a positive change. I know that several people say that nothing can be worse that the last 8 years. Unfortunately, I believe it can get worse. We have done nothing but play in quicksand, and I'm terrified that we may keep sinking. I've tried to put the fear aside, and help to manifest change that we so desperately need.


Now, it's our time to vote. It's time to put action behind our will and desire. That's what I'll be doing and hope you will as well.


Until next time, I'm offering a rope to who ever will take it.
autumn

November 2, 2008

It always happens this way...

"The story I am writing exists, written in absolutely perfect fashion, some place, in the air. All I must do is find it, and copy it." -Jules Renard, "Diary," February 1895

It's day two of the Writember insanity. The novel is going well enough. I'm just slightly behind on my word count. Luckily, its something that I can easily catch up on. So I'm definitely positive there.

I think the problem is actually coming in with the blogs. I don't know if other writers are the same way, but when I am in the zone I have no idea what is going on in the outside world. Hell, I have no idea what is going on in my own world. Nothing exists to me except for my characters and their world. Which leaves me no blog fodder.

I have no intention of giving up though. It's still early on and I'm confident that I will find my rhythm. After all, it's really hard to get me to shut up.

Until next time, bear with me while I find my footing.
autumn

November 1, 2008

I should have listened to Smokey The Bear

What is more cheerful, now, in the fall of the year, than an open-wood-fire? Do you hear those little chirps and twitters coming out of that piece of apple-wood? Those are the ghosts of the robins and blue-birds that sang upon the bough when it was in blossom last Spring. In Summer whole flocks of them come fluttering about the fruit-trees under the window: so I have singing birds all the year round.” - Thomas Bailey Aldrich, Miss Mehitabel's Son


So um, whoops... We had a slight fire issue at the ritual today. You see the fire didn't like where we had it and much preferred the dry ground. The fire then decided it wanted to play in some leaves. I don't blame it. I would love to play in a pile of leaves again myself. We got it under control quickly with snuffing and a sacrificed juice. And, it didn't really affect the energy we were raising. In the end it was just one of those things that will turn into an exaggerated joke "Hey, remember the time Bella set the woods on fire? Yea I really wanted that juice too."


Since I imagine you will be hearing about Bella a bit here, let me go ahead and introduce you. Bella is my cousin, my friend, and my student. She's a great artist and writer. Ok she's just a super slamming person in general.


Today was her first go at writing a ritual. I was very impressed by it. It was well written and flowed beautifully. So yes, I was very happy with her work. Even with the slight issue that came up, she stayed composed and didn't let pressure get to her. So yes, I was very impressed. I have no doubt that she will she be wonderful in whatever path she chooses to go down.


In the meantime, I'll do my best to give her all the tools she needs.


Until next time and as always, Bright Blessings.
autumn

October 31, 2008

Samhain Blessings

"Hark! Hark to the wind! 'Tis the night, they say, When all souls come back from the far away- The dead, forgotten this many a day!"- Virna Sheard


Welcome back to the second post and Happy Samhain to you all. I hope that you are all enjoying it and celebrating in whichever way suits you best. Before I get into the meat of today's entry I just wanted to mention a few things.

The first being that I have definitely lost whats left of my mind. At the last minute I signed up for NaBloPoMo.... National Blog Posting Month. While that doesn't seem so horrid, I'm also continuing my tradition with NaNoWriMo. This is the first time I've taken them both on at the same time. 30 days of blogs and a novel in one month, added to my other dedicated writings. May brain may explode, and I've never been so excited about that prospect before. The second thing I wanted to mention is if you are participating in either of these projects let me know. I need writing buddies. Finally, I'm also going to attempt to write on BeShameless daily. I make no promises there but that's the goal. Like I said I've lost my mind.

So... yea it's totally Samhain. One of my favorite holidays. It's not my favorite, which is odd considering my love affair with all things Autumn and spooky. But, it's definitely in my top 3. Honestly, until a few years ago I could take it or leave it. I enjoyed the rituals and the idea behind it. It just never affected me.

Though, as I said that was a few years ago. I ended up being reminded about a lesser aspect of the holiday in a big way. The biggest part of the Samhain ritual is the respect to the dead, the rememberance, and offering to ancestors.

My teacher celebrated an addition to it. It was, after-all the New Year. A time for change, a time for resolutions, and a time for personal growth. Oh, I hated it. I hated to change, I loved my routine and where I thought I was. I thought the parts he added were pointless. Still... I did it his way when I was a student. Yep, I was extremely oblivious to life...

After our paths split, I didn't those aspects to my first solo Samhain ritual. I split the pomegranate, I did a dumb supper. I did a very generalized ritual. I thought it worked well for me. The wheel turned and it was time for me to do the second solo.

This time however my world fell apart. October 3oth was the end of that person. I'm not going to share the details of the black pit my life became. Let's just say that since I didn't change and grow the universe did it for me. I lost things that I held close. I had no balance in my life. So my choice then became to stay in my miserable existance or to change.

I changed, I grew, I learned. I became me. It wasn't easy and it wasn't fun; but, it was worth it. I found my friends who helped me along the way. Now I'm not so dense as to think that it was simply because I didn't do that part of the ritual. I see now that I was headed into a tailspin.

It did teach me that the part of the ritual was a subconcious cue. And that words, and thoughts have more power than a 18 year old girl could imagine. While my ritual won't take place till tomorrow, it will definitely include resolutions and my celebration of the coming New Year.

Until next time, I will change, grow, and learn.
autumn

October 11, 2008

A Burning Beginning

October's poplars are flaming torches lighting the way to winter.” ~Nova Bair


This time of year is by far my favorite. I come alive mid-autumn and revel in all that surrounds me. I marvel when my trees become artists and paint themselves in reds and oranges. I'm giddy when the nights become crisp. Yes, I definitely love this time of year.


One of the things that I tend to do in October is start several projects. I have a couple ideas on why my life becomes a craft den. The first is that I'm squirreling away things to do so that I get through the winter. The other is because while feeling all of the changes taking place I want to make some of my own. Yes, this is one of my projects. However, it is something that I have been pondering on for quite awhile. It's not something I've done on a whim to abandon before it bores me.


As some of you know, I'm a writer for Beshameless.net. There I write about current events, politics, civil rights, and things that outrage me. I do so in a cynical, sarcastic, and sometimes bitchy manner. While I have no plans of quitting the site, I need more. I need a place to be balanced. I need the outlet for my happy, sad, fear, and (yes still) anger. Moreover, I want my little Pagan place. It's my life and I want to write about it. I want to share interesting information with my brothers and sisters. I want you to be entertained and made to think. Apparently, I want and need a lot.


So, I'm getting started. I hope it's a fantastic ride.


Until next time, Bright Blessings.

Autumn